So save your scissors, for someone else's skin

So, my new carpet comes today. I've had the carpet I currently own all my life and it is really past it. It was probably past it when I was about 15 (being a budding artist from a very early age and a klutz with chocolate milkshake took its toll over the years). I would like it to be here now. I would like everything in my room to be fitted and sorted so I can put my cds and books back in. That's actually the bit I look forward to the most. Reorganising my books and cds. It's silly but I enjoy it.

Something else I enjoy is buying treats for my ratties. I had to go out and buy some more food and I bought a little pot of popcorn, dried banana and dried kiwi fruit for them. Also a woven grass mat for them to snuggle on and chew. It's just nice buying things for them. I'm so glad I have them because they help me through a lot. If shit is hitting the proverbial then I know that just chatting to them will calm me down in that short period before my drugs make everything easier. I'm not sure if they like the kiwi though, they've never had it before so it's a little bit strange for them. I might give them some chocolate in a bit :3

In other news I've completed a secret project. Oooooooh. It's going to stay partially secret for a while though still. But I enjoy making little projects. If they are small then they are easier to complete :). Got another couple in my mind so I'll try and complete those soon and report back with pictures and everything :D

I've been reading a lot. I've read 16 books so far this year, which is pretty good going for me as I am not a quick reader anymore. I can't read when there is talking going on or the tv is on. It's too hard to concentrate on the words. But 16 is pretty good going, almost 3 a month. My percentage is of books that I've read of all my books is 57.4% which is terrible! I need to read more books than I buy :D. Hopefully I'll read loads over summer and get though a nice batch of stories and then I can buy more books without feeling a tiny bit guilty at having not read the ones I already own. Really the appropriate percentage is 80% read so I'm quite a bit off... almost 100 books off. So it'll be a couple of years before I get there but I'd like to get to 65% by the end of this year, maybe even 70%! That would be good.

Oh apparently even though the carpet should come today it won't be layed until the weekend. I'm hideously disappointed now. I was looking forward to putting quite a few things into my room finally. I can't help but be a little bit disappointed. Also when my room is done I'm getting a little bamboo plant :D well three sticks of bamboo in water. They grow like that though. I'm well excited. I might even be able to not kill it :p

Love y'all

Buttercup

xxxxx

I encourage your smiles, I expect you won't cry.

So I've started this blog twice now and to no avail. My writing just isn't happening today so I'll just put some shiz down and hopefully write down that and make a better blog later. I just want to get writing again. But to that in a bit. Maybe this blog will write itself :)

So first off I've started a mini exercise regime. I've only been going a couple of days (today was day two so I'm being literal :D). I've been feeling terribly lazy so I've started just doing little things to build on core strength. I've got absolutely no core strength. I can swim for about an hour solidly (breast stroke), and I can cycle for quite a while so I know I have endurance. I can dance my way through Zumba no problem but when it comes to holding moves in T'ai Chi my legs shake and my arms ache. I have no real strength there. So I'm going with the basics and so far this is what I am managing:

• 10 star jumps from crouching position
• 10 push ups (from knees, not full ones but I prefer from knees so nyeh).
• 10 squats
• 10 sit ups
• 3x10seconds planks

Yeah ok that looks pretty pathetic but I'm going to build up slowly and with what I have. I'm also going to play on my dance mat at least every other day and maybe start doing yoga at home. I'm just going to keep trying because I want to be fitter. I know that while I'm not terribly unfit, I could really do with being fitter. I'm also going to hopefully join a T'ai Chi group in Heaton and build on that. I've been terrible and not been going for a month or so whilst finishing my work but I would love to get it back into the swing of things.

I also read about a way of eating food, note this is not a diet but a thought process. But I think I will get back to you guys on that when I know more. It sounds interesting to say the least and things that are interesting are often worth having a look at :).

My Xbox360 has died, which is the ultimate of sadness, or it would be if I felt much. In theory it is very sad especially as Alice came on the same day it died. Seriously? The one game I've been waiting to play since I played the first one (although I didn't finish it because it was scary :P) and that's been since high school. And the instant it comes out, my console dies. It's just... a little frustrating is all. And to buy a new one is £180 and I'm not sure I can justify spending that kind of money at the moment. If I had a job then sure, I would go into Game and buy a sweet little 250gb slim and be very happy with my purchase, but as it is I'm just going to have to wait.

I was going to draw today but I never got round to it :/ I guess I may do some tomorrow. Got some designs to work out and then try out :D and I would like to do some general drawing. Apparently at one point I was almost vaguely competent at things like that. Now I'm not doing anything I think I will start to challenge myself more... if I remember. I should write a list!

Lists are awesome.

I'll upload some pictures if I get round to making any :)

I'm going to head to bed to read some more of The Beach by Alex Garland. It's rather good :D

Love from Buttercup

xxx

And the red ones make me fly and the blue ones help me fall.

Totally into Headfirst For Halos at the moment but that is starting from the middle of a story, one that may not be told by the end. Who knows. HELLO people *waves*.

So I've been mooching and not bloggerating and before that was the fault of university assignments but now they are no more. I am awaiting my marks so I cannot tell you if I've actually passed yet or not but I don't feel like anything major could go wrong.

There is a moth in the sitting room. It bothers me, less because of its nature because moths essentially aren't out to get me but try to fly towards light, but more because every so often something suddenly moves and that is bothersome. I wonder why moths don't fly during the day because whenever they come out at night fly towards lights, and surely it would make more sense for them to be out during the day when it is light.

So I am in the sitting room. Now this is of interest to those who understand my computer set up. I own, a rather large, upright, tower unit computer with a flat screen monitor (a usb mouse apparently by microsoft, a really old ps2 keyboard that clunks and says WIN95 in it's model code and a 5.1 speaker system that only was utilising 3.1 of it's 5.1 in case you wanted to know my entire setup).

P.S. The moth just flew by pretty close to my feet. I get a little worried that it will land on my foot and crawl up my trousers but that's just the paranoia talking.

I do not own a laptop, nor am I using one. My keyboard is clunkitying along nicely. Normally this would be coming from my bedroom but folks I have been dislodged from my hole! I am currently in the sitting room in front of my computer.

My brother has just come in to tell me I need to move the car. Neither of us drive. I guess it's time to go push... sigh. BRB.

Success, we just pushed the car like... a few inches. I clearly have strengths! He needed to put the garden bin out and the car was in the way and daddy was in bed so he moved the car out fine and put out the bin but couldn't shift the car back. Go team work go!

Mothy's back. Apparently it didn't go up my trouser legs which is good.

So yes I have been evicted from my bedroom. As have practically all of my possessions. This is because mama has decided it is time to redecorate. This is excellent because once it is redecorated I can have all of my books in my room again - the mold issue should be solved with things that we have done to the way like special paint and paper. This shall be excellent but it does mean that I can currently find anything because everything is in crates and that is a bother. Living you life in crates and stacks sucks. But I have made a little nest for myself in front of one of the chairs and that is good.

My music of the moment is really My Chemical Romance although I might be over listening them so I might cut back on  that. You never want to cause Chasing Car syndrome on the music you like because that is just bothersome. I'll have to make up a playlist or something. On the topic of playlists though I kind of want to make a mix tape (or at least a mix cd) of some good tunes but I don't have a cd player so I would burn the cd and put it into my computer... where all my music is stored. Sometimes technological advancements are a bother. I mean I look at my generation with the sudden rise of mp3 players, data dvds, iPads etc.. You can see where I am going with that. I feel all "back in my day" but I can't really help it. When we had our last day of compulsory school (year 11/gcses/age 16ish) some of us, myself included, used cameras with 35mm film to record the day. With possibly 24-32 exposures. I see some of my younger friends and their last day of school and they have hundreds of photos. All digital. I mean digital cameras were obviously available, daddy had access to one from school, but the difference is incredible. People take a lot more photos now because there is no physical object. No film is wasted, no money wasted through development. It's a blessing and a hindrance. Now everyone can be an instant artist with a camera but this is a lot of crap out there. I'm  guilty of that too. I dunno. Maybe it's like Blue told me the other day, maybe I'm having a quarter life crisis.

Although what happened in my teen years, what was that? Pre quarter life crisis?

Mothy was bothering Jona so he's now removed it from the room, possibly, it kinda vanished apparently. Mothy mothy mothy it's probably lying in wait upstairs.

This blog has very little point. I'm just rambling as usual. But it is pretty late, optimum rambling time as Panda knows because this is around when he is in from work and then I get to talk to him.

Aaaaanyway I'll try and update more often. I just keep forgetting, because I am terrible! =D

Next time there might even be pictures

See you around.

Love Buttercup xxx

And now, the end is near and so we face the final curtain

Hello there dear readers, of whom you are probably even more reduced in number seeing as I haven't properly posted here since Wednesday 6th April but things have been a foot and whilst I near the end of this I would like to share a little insight into what's been going on.

Currently I am sitting at my computer, obviously as I need it to type this =p, still in my pyjamas with the sound of screaming children wafting through the slightly open window. This is the horror of living next to a school when they have P.E. outdoors. Actually the worst days are when they have Sports Day and they choose to blast music for the children to make it more fun. Now as wonderful as that is for the children they actually play the music loud enough that it cuts through my window being shut and my music playing at a relatively loud volume. But that is neither here nor there because that day is yet to grace this year's calender.

So what have I been doing? Well I was in a show, this time in the "orchestra" which was a nice change, for HMS Pinafore. It was pretty good, I personally would have liked to do something different because I've done HMS already (and when you can say you've only done 4 G&S shows comparatively to most of my other G&S friends that's not a lot). It's good though with the music and the much more digestible plot but you know I enjoy not knowing what the show is about until I get to the dress rehearsal and suddenly it all starts to make sense. Yes it makes it rather hellish for the audience but I enjoy the "what the fuckery?" that accompanies these shows. So this took a lot of my time for a while. Mostly metally =p

And then I had various assignments to complete... now I use the term various relatively loosely. I had one essay (2.5-3k), a composition portfolio (2 compositions and 5 reviews), and a minor dissertation (6k) to write. But I tell you, dearest friends of mine, that this was not easy.

I am still currently in the process of completing my dissertation (and I am pretty chuffed with it if I'm honest, if only because earlier this month it was looking like an impossible task) that is due in for tomorrow. This is actually going to happen as well which, looking back at the previous statement, makes me a very chuffed little person indeed!

I'm not going to blog too much about it because I facebook status almost continuously about it (sorry facebook chums of mine) but here is a list of what I still have remaining (more for myself than anything else):

1. Disclaimer - to write.
2. Glossary - to complete (mostly written).
3. CD - to label and to stick wallet onto card for binding.
4. Webography - to complete (started).
5. Discography (music, games and film) - to move from original document into final complete document.

And then

1. Completely check over everything one last time.
2. Print first copy, recheck everything and insert CD card.
3. Print second copy, recheck everything and insert CD card.
4. Place both copies into individual wallets so as not to mess them up.
5. Get both copies bound.
6. Submit in office by 4pm tomorrow.
7. Submit digital copy and email relevant staff by 4pm tomorrow
8. Celebratory drinkings HIGHLY IMPORTANT!

And that is that. Ok this blog isn't interesting to anyone really but I will be coming back soon enough with pictures and things of interest!

Love from Buttercup xxx 

Who are you, who who who who?

Ok so I've neglected blogging for a while... which is annoying because I've read books that I should review and listened to music that I should review but I just don't have the time to sit and blog for an hour or so. When I'm not working I'm taking breaks in the form of not writing so while I could blog in my breaks it's writing and that makes the break feel less breaky.

Since the last blog I have read: Ink Exchange and Fragile Eternity (both by Melissa Marr) and started on Acorna's People (Anne McCaffrey). I've bought a greatest hits of The Who (because they are awesome and CSI is awesome) and fallen further in love with MCR and started learning tab for Unintended to see if I can't crack guitar tabs (also learning to bar chord which is starting to work sometimes =D). I've played on Rainbow 6 Vegas 2 with my brother (FPS) (he's better than I am), Viva Pinata (again) and some Dynasty Warriors 6 (again). I've been to a concert, rehearsals, slept to much and worked too little. I've fallen back in love with classical music, especially the more modern, slightly dissonant music.

I've eaten more candy in the past couple of days than I have in the past few months and I'm still going. I'm no further forward with my tai chi but I'm still going with it because it is the most wonderfully soothing thing to do.

I've gained a piercing and now have 7 which is a better number but I'm still trying to work out if I can feasibly make it to 11 without looking overkill... if I can't I'll have to settle on 9.

I've been snapping pictures on my camera as often as I can, but losing days through working. I've discovered the joys of Spotify for my work but can't ever see it replacing iTunes and buying cds. I've looked though old photos and remembered that the old days before medication weren't actually all that bad sometimes.

I've realised that I am who I am and that is who I want to be.

I'm not moving out any time soon but I'm kind of ok with that. I would love more room space but don't have the mental strength yet to tackle living without the parental wing to guide me and keep me safe.

I can finally climb my bed-ladder without anything on it (except my current book and iPod for nighttimes). and I don't remember the last time that was actually possible.

I'm hermitising but actually don't feel too bad for it, although I should get out and see more people... maybe in a month when uni is finally over.

I'm looking forward to the new American McGee's Alice game and I'm very much determined to play through the original (360 download) before cracking into the sequel and completing that! Also rather determined to make some progress again on Persona 4 and to finish FFXIII this summer and maybe crack open Dragon Age again. 

At some point I'm going to start looking for jobs but it's of no hurry anymore since I'm not moving out.

I have a lot of work to do and I'm not sure how I will finish it in time but I have to because it's the final stretch. This is it. No more past this. I'm aiming for a 2.1. I might hit lower, I mostly likely won't hit higher but that is my aim. I'll keep going until I make it. Sure there may be some late nights and early mornings and some removal of the internet to force work out but it will get done. I will finish this damned degree. Then I shall drink and sleep and dance to my heart's content.

I think that's it. A whirlwind catch up. Back to the workings!

I'm wrecking this evening already and loving every minute of it, the things she does to please, she's just a little tease.

OMG how many wednesday's have I missed? There is a really good reason for that. I've kind of run out of wishing for things. I mean there are things I still want but they're all kind of... well materialistic. I mean they all have been but it feels like it's the wrong time for that right now. But I will tell you more of my materialistic wants today because I feel in the mood to =D

I want this fellow, not with white skin though... with natural pink but it's the make up that I would like. I've been talking to Blue too much about these dolls and I keep wanting them more and more but at £300+ I can't really justify having one. Overglorified barbie dolls technically but so so so pretty. I'd have to develop the character before I bought one too. I know I want to make a Reki (fem), Seppha (male) and a Snow (male) but I also kind of want to make L'luo and Dust (both male) and possibly Ryan (obv. male). I tend to make up male characters it seems =p. Although I have just seen an almost perfect Rosemary... I need to get off this website. Snow will be a difficulty to get because he has elfin ears and they aren't easy to get, they also tend to have vampire teeth when they have pointed ears and he certainly doesn't want that. Dust will be tricky to get the right skin tone (being overly tanned) and then all the wigs will be really tricky and will have to be customs...

I should make less complicated characters =p

I'm getting a jacket similar to that one hopefully tomorrow. It won't be real leather... some sort of synthetic nonsense but it's a nice shape and style. I'm also hopefully going to get a proper leather one soon. I might look at the leather ones tomorrow and things may change. I'm into being a biker chick right now. I think that's the Reki influence. She's a lot cooler than I am. Maybe I'll just buy both =D I do like having clothes. This isn't really a wishlist item since I know I'm buying one or the other tomorrow but it is something pretty I want =D

I want to learn to walk in high heels. I can't even walk in shoes with anything more than about an inch. I would love to be able to go out in heels and it not break my feet within seconds. Have I discussed this already? I don't know but I have a desire to go out a little more often than I have done and I would like to be able to wear heels (with cons kept in my bag as an emergence back up =p) so I'm going to practise in my little town shoes. They're really cute. We'll see if I can do it.

Ok done now. That was kind of meh actually. I was wondering why I am part of so many different blogging devices and I can't actually work out why. I don't know why I tell people about the things I do or want. I have a twitter, tumblr, live journal and here. Only the live journal is hidden (because that's for a completely different purpose). Why do I blog? Why do I tweet? I don't honestly know. Am I looking for the internet fame that seems to occur to some people? Or am I just doing it for the experience? The craic? So my friends know more about what I am doing and maybe it will spark a conversation since I am pretty introverted at the moment? I'm not really sure.

Although I am a bit of a contradiction at the moment. I'm introverted except I've made my hair pink (and that got a lot of looks), I'm dressing up like a biker chick (that has involved some very very short skirts) and idk I feel a bit like I'm bouncing back and forth between different ideas. I have an urge to give myself a moustache and travel into town on the bus... but I don't think that would be the best idea I've ever had =p also then I'd be doing tai-chi with an eyeliner moustache... mebs not =p (edit: tai chi isn't even on today so that was a moot point).

For a long time I didn't like this band. You know that song? I Write Sins Not Tragedies? It was that song. I was on holiday and I woke up at least once every hour from about 2am with the lines "I chimed in with a 'haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?'" going through my head. I would have loved that song if it hadn't kept me up all night running through my head. I started listening to it recently and it has improved from just background music to music I would choose to listen to (and have rocked out to on the bus). I had the same thing with Fall Out Boy, they had to grow on me before I enjoyed their music. It's certainly going to be part of my playlist from now on =)

And rising =)

These albums are the ones I have by Emilie Simon, who is a french electronica artist. The first two (self titled, and vegetal) are very electronicapop (not electropop which is more owl city and cutesy people or like dance pop... this is electronica techniques with a poppier vocal... I know what I mean). La marche de l'Empereur is the soundtrack for the film (in English) The March of the Penguins (voice over by Morgan Freeman). It's a different sound but still very nice. I've been listening to her a lot. Some of her songs are in French and some are in English and all of them sound wonderful. I really like her music. Seriously check her out because she's interesting. I love Dame de Lotus and En Cendres (both from Vegetal) and I absolutely love her cover of Come As You Are (Original by Nirvana) which is from her live album A L'Olympia (I only have this track from there). There is also a Velvet Underground cover of Femme Fatale on the self titled album that is wonderful.

(all three)

46, 47, 48, 49

Ok I couldn't find the right cover but that will have to do (I am always bothered by not being able to find the right cover for things!). So I found this book in the local secondhand book shop (called The Keel Row for those who know) and thought... why not? I wanted to watch the film at some point but why not read the book first and see what the craic is. It's a pretty good book actually (a novella technically and it came first which I like =) ).

I can see the link in style from the way Holly Golightly speaks and the way that Blair Waldorf in Gossip Girl talks (Blair wants to be Holly and B@T is her favourite film so it makes sense but it's such a nice link!). She is an interesting character who doesn't really seem to know what she's doing except maybe she does she just pretends not to. It's a bit Catcher in the Rye (although set over a much longer period than just a few days).

It was enjoyable and not too long. The plot was nice but was more socially revolving than plotbased. It was a nice read. There were three other short stories in my version and they were rather nice as well. Again revolving more around thoughts and feelings and memories than plot but that is a nice change =).

I recommend it and now hope to snag a copy of the film from Joey who in turn gets to borrow the book =D

8/52 (I'm so behind on my book challenge... *shrugs*)

Ok, off to do a different task on my list of tasks to do today =D

Love Buttercup xxx

You can fall for chains of silver, you can fall for chains of gold

I've been neglecting my blogspace. I'm terrible =p... Actually I've not been doing that much really. Sleeping a lot. I seem to be terribly lacking in energy all the time and I'm not really sure why. Sleeping 12hours isn't even helping and normally that's one of the cures for me. Oh well.

Been doing quite a bit of work... I should really be doing more but I'm doing what I can so hopefully I'll graduate from uni this year. Not doing a masters... because well... a masters in music isn't going to help me get anywhere with anything so I'm just going to call it a day with my official musical education. I'm hopefully going to keep it up but at the moment I am far more interested in photography than music... whoops. I also may well be making some pewter pendants with the huge lump of lead-free pewter daddy gave me and the polymorph to make the master. I'm rather excited to try it out but I'm waiting for some extra time to play. I think I might draw up some designs... start off really basic but hopefully I'll be making more complicated designs. Proper metal work!

Also may be getting a little tutor help from daddy's friend at work who does a lot of jewellery design. Win!

I'll tell you if I start taking requests =p

I've noticed my hair is well fading fast... for a dye that everyone reviewed as the most longlasting semi-permanent dye it might as well be called permanent... it's not doing too great in my books. Idk... I expected something a little, better? The underneath that I play with (because it's so soft) and rubs against my clothes seems like it's completed reverted to my natural colour. Same with the strands that get tucked behind my ears. I might pick up some stargazer just before graduation to top it up (unless mama is really against me having pink hair for grad =p). Maybe my hair is trying to tell me that it's had enough of dyes and is rejecting it any way it can.

I finished my first MSH (monthly scavenger hunt) in March. 

 The mosaic of images that I submitted. From L-R

Hello Kitty!, Arch, Volume, Error Message, Cash Only.

Available, Marker, Escalator, Rough, Acid.

Washer, Illuminate, London Bridge, Limo, Ticket To Ride

Rainbow, Arrange, Vein, Elevator, Lips.

I'm really proud of myself for that because all of my photos were new for that month. Some people use quite a bit of archive work and it's allowed so that's not a bother but I like to only submit new works. Going to start work on this month's batch as well. I already have some ideas so that's a good start. But there are some mighty tricky ones! Some of them I was pretty proud of if I'm honest. I worked pretty hard to get the colours just right (as that is one of the most important things to me). I love colour! And macro =D

I've been playing a lot of guitar recently and if my throat would finally fix itself then I would be doing it a lot more. I'm enjoying singing Soul of Fireflies, California Dreamin' and Romeo and Juliet. They're my favourite ones right now =) maybe I'll let you hear one when I'm able to sing, and not mess up at least one chord everytime I play =p

I finished reading a book. The second of the Acorna series:

This book is turning more and more into the Tower and Hive series but I'm forgiving it for the fact that I love that series and this one is just as good so far. One thing I'm happy about is that I noticed that the name Johnny Greene (a character in this book) was familiar. Apparently he appears in every series (a bit like Cid from FF... yes I just compared AMcC to FF)... I only recognised his name from T&H (when I say that I combine T&H with The Pegasus trilogy where I actually remember his name from but there is a Gollee Gren who apparently is a variant name: The Johnny Greene Thread some seem tenuous at best... but that's probably because she didn't want literally the same name throughout) but that means he should also be in Dragons of Pern (although I don't remember his name... oh well I may just have to reread it all to find him! =p).

Anyway the plot is pretty good, I really like the characters and there are a lot of mishaps that occur that you could just imagine happening IRL. They're the sort that you would just happen because they would annoy you. Trust me, I do know what I'm saying even if I don't make any sense. If you like Sci-Fi/Fantasy (not either or... I actually mean a combo of the two) then you will probably like this. I can't wait to read the next two but I've started on a different book in the mean time and I'm already half way through =p (although it is a collection of short stories so it won't take long).

Okies I have stuff to do...

Love Buttercup xxx